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Friday, December 14, 2007

- 19 SAYINGS WE'D LIKE To See On Office Posters

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19 Sayings We'd Like To See On Office Posters

1. Rome did not create a great empire by having meetings, they did it by killing all those who opposed them.

2. If you can stay calm, while all around you there is chaos, then you probably haven't completely understood the seriousness of the situation.

3. Doing a job RIGHT the first time gets the job done. Doing the job WRONG fourteen times gives you job security.

4. Artificial intelligence is no match for Natural Stupidity.

5. A person who smiles in the face of adversity probably has a scapegoat.

6. Plagiarism saves time.

7. If at first you don't succeed, try management.

8. Never put off until tomorrow what you can avoid altogether.

9. TEAMWORK: means never having to take all the blame yourself.

10. The beatings will continue until morale improves.

11. Never underestimate the power of very stupid people in large groups.

12. We waste time, so you don't have to.

13. Hang in there, retirement is only 50 years away!

14. Never criticize someone until you've walked a mile in their shoes; that way, when you criticize them, you're a mile away AND you have their shoes!

15. A snooze button is a poor excuse for no alarm clock at all.

16. When the going gets tough, the tough take a coffee break.

17. INDECISION: is the key to FLEXIBILITY.

18. Succeed in spite of management.
19. Aim Low, Reach your Goals, Avoid Disappointment !!!

- GREAT FALL "Rainbows Of Color" (#2)

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GREAT FALL "Rainbows Of Color" (group #2)







- BABY'S FIRST Doctor Visit...

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BABY'S FIRST Doctor Visit...


A woman and a baby were in the doctor's examining room, waiting for the doctor to come in for the baby's first exam.

The doctor arrived, examined the baby, checked his weight, and being a little concerned, asked if the baby was breast-fed or bottle-fed.
"Breast-fed" she replied.

"Well, strip down to your waist," the doctor ordered.

She did as he directed.

He pinched her nipples, then pressed, kneaded, and rubbed both breasts for a while in a detailed examination. Motioning to her to get dressed, he said,
"No wonder this baby is underweight. You don't have any milk."

"I know," she said with a smile, "I'm his Grandma, but I'm glad I brought him in today !"

Thursday, December 13, 2007

- YACHT DELIVERY DAY !

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YACHT DELIVERY DAY !


One 65' custom-built motor yacht complete with 4 staterooms, a state-of-the-art galley, GPS System and radar for navigation, twin supercharged diesel engines, etc... ready for delivery.

$4,500,000.00
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Champagne, chocolate covered strawberries with cream and music dockside for the excited "soon to be owners" and a small group of friends.

$500.00
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Two corporate representatives, one crane, and rigging complete with faulty turnbuckle.

$2,500/hour
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(Note the guy in the stern !)
Watching your dreamboat nose dive into the harbor, accompanied by two corporate Representatives just prior to "inking" the final paperwork...

PRICELESS !