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Thursday, March 13, 2008

- OLD COWBOY Goes Into A Bar...

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OLD COWBOY Goes Into A Bar...


An old cowboy sat down at the bar and ordered a drink.

As he sat sipping his drink, a young woman sat down next to him.

She turned to the cowboy and asked, "Are you a real cowboy?"

He replied, "Well, I've spent my whole life, breaking colts, working cows, going to rodeos, fixing fences, pulling calves, bailing hay, doctoring calves, cleaning my barn, fixing flats, working on tractors, and feeding my dogs, so I guess I am a cowboy."

She said, "I'm a lesbian. I spend my whole day thinking about women. As soon as I get up in the morning, I think about women. When I shower, I think about women. When I watch TV, I think about women. I even think about women when I eat. It seems that everything makes me think of women."

The two sat sipping in silence.

A little while later, a man sat down on the other side of the old cowboy and asked, "Are you a real cowboy?"

He replied, "I always thought I was, but I just found out I'm a lesbian."

Tuesday, March 11, 2008

- What goes around comes around.

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What goes around comes around.


His name was Fleming, and he was a poor Scottish farmer.
One day, while trying to make a living for his family, he heard a cry for help coming from a nearby bog.
He dropped his tools and ran to the bog.
There, mired to his waist in black muck, was a terrified boy, screaming and struggling to free himself.
Farmer Fleming saved the lad from what could have been a slow and terrifying death.

The next day, a fancy carriage pulled up to the Scotsman's sparse surroundings.
An elegantly dressed nobleman stepped out and introduced himself as the father of the boy Farmer Fleming had saved. 'I want to repay you,' said the nobleman.
'You saved my son's life.'
'No, I can't accept payment for what I did,' the Scottish farmer replied waving off the offer.

At that moment, the farmer's own son came to the door of the family hovel.
'Is that your son?' the nobleman asked.
'Yes,' the farmer replied proudly.

'I'll make you a deal.
Let me provide him with the level of education my own son will enjoy.
If the lad is anything like his father, he'll no doubt grow to be a man we both will be proud of.'

And that he did.

Farmer Fleming's son attended the very best schools and in time, graduated from St. Mary's Hospital Medical School in London, and went on to become known throughout the world as the noted Sir Alexander Fleming, the discoverer of Penicillin.
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Years afterward, the same nobleman's son who was saved from the bog was stricken with pneumonia.

What saved his life this time?
Penicillin.

The name of the nobleman?
Lord Randolph Churchill.

His son's name?
Sir Winston Churchill.
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Someone famous once said: What goes around comes around.


- Live like its Heaven on Earth.

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Live... Love... and Laugh !!!

Work like you don't need the money.

Love like you've never been hurt.

Dance like nobody's watching.

Sing like nobody's listening.

Live like its Heaven on Earth.

- AN IRISH FRIENDSHIP WISH

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AN IRISH FRIENDSHIP WISH:

May there always be work for your hands to do;
May your purse always hold a coin or two;


May the sun always shine on your windowpane;
May a rainbow be certain to follow each rain;


May the hand of a friend always be near you;
May God fill your heart with gladness to cheer you.

- "DOGS Welcome"

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"Dogs Welcome"

A man wrote a letter to a small hotel in a Midwest town he planned to visit on his vacation.
He wrote:
"I would very much like to bring my dog with me.
He is well-groomed and very well-behaved.
Would you be willing to permit me to keep him in my room with me at night?"
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An immediate reply came from the hotel owner, who wrote:
"I've been operating this hotel for many years.
In all that time, I've never had a dog steal towels, bedclothes, silverware or pictures off the walls.
I've never had to evict a dog in the middle of the night for being drunk and disorderly.
And I've never had a dog run out on a hotel bill.
Yes, in deed, your dog is welcome at my hotel.
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And... if your dog will vouch for you... you're welcome to stay here, too."